The Boston Story. Part: One.

Now for those of the weak of heart, go get a better heart of gather the fuck around for one of the most fucking amazing stories you sweet ass will ever hear. the evening begins at tims house AKA my house on a calm satudat evening. I was enjoying a nice bagel toasted with some sweet sour cream and amazing jelly. Let me tell you this combination of cream and jelly melts in your mouth, if it dosent you are fucking stupid or a retard cause its awesome. So i was sitting at home when jared calles me, and i ignore it as usual. Im like whart the fuck hes gonna tell me to chug a brewski and i dont want too at 2 PM so i just ignore it. Soon after i begin to ponder, hmm maybe i Can go down for the evening even though i HATE Boston and enjoy Jared for onbe night. I owe this fine soldier this honor to come and visit him. So i Drive my shitty ass Honda down to visit this asshole whom i love to the towen i despise. So on the way there traffic, who would have guessed in the asshole shit ass FUCK town of boston whom i HATE. So i arrive in Boston, we eat some food and get some booze and then go to eat at Jarteds PAD. So whilst boozin, he gets this call from this bitch sayin we need to go out soon. Jared, with his dick as his compass says ok tim we need to go and im like what the FUCK. I want to drink some more and jareds like get the fuck up so i pound as much as i can and then leave for a night out on the town. Let me tell you, the first hour, i was pissed caused we rid this shit stained train and subway only native to boston cause ti sucks ballz and i FUCKIN HATE BOSTON!. So after we get off we still have to walk 5 miles to thr first baer we are at and let me tell you, its a fucking asshole in the wall. We alk in and theres like 2 tables made of shit and a fucking bar, i was pissed. A Pabst Blue Ribbor beer was 5 BUCKS! FUCK BOSTON FUCK THEM!!!! I HATE boston with ass my ass and penis cause i will piss on anyone from boston even if its a hot wonen. Then ill piss on her then fuck her, FUCK BOSTON. Ok well we left thius first bar abnd went to some club where it was packed and it was a prertty shady bar/ club. So we arrive at this second club and i wan tto drink heavily cause im still sober so i buy like 3 shots and 9 brewskis. So im feeling prwetty good and all or a sudden i se this HOTTIE in a corner. And when i say hottie i mean a Large 55 year old Texan woman. let me tell you, she was wasted out of her mind and i wanted to get some pussy so i was trying my best which is trying my physics and asshole jokes and she was buying them as above prices! I was so pumped, i was like holy shit im gonn go to Jareds places and bang this shit out of this babe, but i was mistaken..... After a few rounds the bar tender askes me to take this bitch home and im like i dont know who she is and later im like i k now the fuck she is and shies coming home with me you bouncer. So we eventually leave in a cab that i made her pay for cause i had literally no mney left and i dont rememeber the cab ride homr but it must have been sweet and sour as the chinese might say. SO... we get back to the hotel room and BOOM, shes making out with me on the way in but she doset have her card. So we went to the front desk and im making out with this old bad in front of the workers and i dont give a shit becAUSE IM GONNA FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF HER and the desk people just laugh and give us the key, sorry for the caps, but i really fuck the shit out out her. Alright i gots to slow down and have a drink which im gonna do now and have a lot of it so fuck you BITCH. Ok so we get back to the room and i take a piss. So i get out and she goes in and im so excited that im taking off all my clothes cause i want the pussy and im SO EXCITED and im just pitchin a tent makde for fucking red bull himself. So she comes out totally dressed and im like what the fuck ok im gonna havwe to do all the work and so i do. Firsrt parts first, i start to take off her shoes and i have trouble and im like what the fuck so i just rip them off breaking the strap i dont give a shit. So her Shoes are off, so the rest just falls off like a giod damn dorrito on vacation. AKA... it all just fals off. Oh man so not gonna lie i had trouble with her shoes but hey who cares ill fuck her with her shoes on, hey who wouldnt. I WOULD!!!!... Ok so her clothes are off, lets just say that I AM PUTTING THIS IN CAPS CAUSE YOU NEED TO HEAD THIS... I FUCKED THE SHIT OUT OF HER ALL NIGHT LOOOOOOONG.